They wanted this album to be a surprise for Uncle Fyodor too.

Pechkin, in order to find out what was happening there at night, climbed a tree and began to look out the window from above. And thinks:

“They are so disgusting! I can't sleep because of them!"

At this time, a film was shown on TV about brave aunts.

Sharik and Matroskin are not up to the aunts, they turned on the TV like that, for disguise. But Pechkin is interested. He sees half of the screen from his tree, and the second is not visible to him. Where are the most daring aunts. He began to reach out to see the second half of the screen. And from a tree plopped right into a barrel of water.

On the street, I must say, autumn was already cold. By the time Pechkin had run home, he would have caught a cold.

He is more likely to knock on Uncle Fedor:

Oh, rather let me get warm and dry!

Cat Matroskin "The Life of Uncle Fyodor" hid under the table and asks:

And where did you swim, Uncle Pechkin, why are you so wet from head to toe?

Yes, in a barrel under your window.

But who put you in this barrel?

Yes, no one. I stuffed myself into it. I fell from a tree.

And what did you do on the tree - ripened? - Sharik asks sarcastically.

I looked to see if all your electric stoves were turned off.

Either tell the truth, or we will not dry you, - Matroskin said firmly.

And Pechkin confessed that he was peeping out of curiosity.

Okay, dry yourself on the stove, - the cat allowed. - And when you dry, help us make a photo album. You can also be of use, because you are very observant.

And Pechkin quickly dried up and began to help the cat and Sharik.

He was indeed very observant. He said:

This photo is called “Evening in Prostokvashino”. And it's not evening. You see, the cows are walking past the post office to the right, horns forward. So, they are only driven out into the field. So, this is "Morning in Prostokvashino". And here it says: "Uncle Fyodor delivers mail in a boat during a flood." And he delivered mail in a trough. So this photo should be called like this: "Uncle Fyodor rides in a boat in his spare time."

The postman Pechkin has never been so pleased as on this wet day.

Uncle Fyodor knew exactly when his birthday was. He was born in autumn, in October.

On the birthday of Uncle Fyodor, the cat Matroskin decided to compose poems for him. He sat at the table and wrote:

I will not regret kind words

And uncle Fyodor for the anniversary

I will create a poem

And then I'll give it to him.

The dog Sharik was twirling around all this time and getting in the way.

My dear uncle Fedor,

You are beautiful like... how...

Tomato! shouts Sharik.

What is a tomato? - Matroskin is indignant. - Don't go!

And continues:

Uncle Fedor, dear friend,

You are dear to us...

Iron! shouts Sharik.

What an iron! - asks Matroskin.

Electric! Sharik says. - Very expensive.

Matroskin asks:

Listen, Sharik, go away, please don't interfere.

And continues:

Never be sad

Be brilliant like...

Tram, - prompts Sharik.

We walk forward together

And we love so much...

Compote! shouts Sharik.

Matroskin asks:

Have you come up with anything else?

Soup, cutlets, - says Sharik.

Well, that's what, - Matroskin spat, - you can compose this nonsense without me. I'd rather complete a photo album for Uncle Fyodor.

And Sharik took all the drafts of Matroskin, copied them out and presented them to Uncle Fyodor.

Our dear, uncle Fedor,

You are beautiful like a tomato!

Never be sad

Be shiny like a tram.

We walk forward together

And we love compote very much,

Also cutlets.

All poets love them.

Uncle Fyodor never laughed like that in his life. Especially his "tomato" amused.

On the birthday of Uncle Fyodor in Prostokvashino, dad and mom came and gave him a real toy railway. The whole village came to play with Uncle Fyodor. And the postman Pechkin too.

One winter in Prostokvashino, a lot of snow fell. So many that you couldn't even leave the house.

What do we do? - Uncle Fyodor asks.

Nothing, says the cat. We will stay at home until the food runs out.

One day they sat, two sat, three sat. Everything, the products are over. Uncle Fedor says:

It is necessary to start tr-tr Mitya, go for food.

Tr-tr Mitya - it was such a special tractor that worked not on gasoline, but on food: on potatoes there, on cucumbers, on meatballs.

They climbed out into the street through the window, the snow around waist-deep. Somehow they got to the barn and started the tractor.

Let's go! - says Uncle Fedor.

Stop! shouts Matroskin. - They forgot the most important thing. - He returned to the barn and for some reason took a fishing rod.

Uncle Fyodor is driving to the right, to where a large grocery store is, and Mitya is driving in the other direction. Towards a rustic cafe. They bake pancakes there.

OK. We drove up, went into a cafe, ate pancakes.

Now we need to give pancakes to the tractor. Otherwise, he won’t budge, - Uncle Fyodor and Sharik say.

Look what you thought! - angry cat. - Feed the tractor with pancakes! You give him more cakes in the tank!

How to be? - Uncle Fyodor asks.

Here's how, says the cat. - I've thought of everything.

He got on a tractor, put the last pancake on a fishing rod and hung it in front of the tractor's nose. The tractor pulled after him. So they up grocery store arrived.

Now it's a different matter, - said Matroskin. - Now we'll feed him.

And he poured half a bag of buckwheat into the tractor tank.

Matroskin always saved everything. He especially saved food. Because he's seen everything in his life.

As you know, the dog Sharik was a very hunting dog. And he felt sorry for shooting animals. So he hunted with a photo gun. And he sent photographs to various newspapers.

One day on the eve of the Year of the Pig, he received an order from the magazine "Hunting and Dog Breeding" to photograph a wild boar in the forest in winter.

Sharik took a gun and went into the forest.

He sniffs the air - he doesn't smell like a wild boar at all. And then the huntsman-forester Kuznetsov, an old acquaintance, met him and asked:

What are you doing here?

Yes, they asked me to photograph wild boars.

This huntsman Kuznetsov was a big joker. He says:

What boars?! They go south in winter.

But what about? - asks Sharik.

Yes, says the huntsman. - I have a huge pig, Canadian. We will paint her with shoe polish, tie her fangs, take her into the forest - and take pictures as much as you want.

So they did. Painted the pig with shoe polish. Fangs of plastic tied. They brought the pig by the collar into the forest and led it into the bushes. Ah clean boar!

And Sharik "boar" began to photograph. I just managed to take two pictures, when suddenly - the guard! - wolves from the forest came running, as many as five pieces. (They are known to smell a pig a mile away.)

It started here! The pig squeals, pressed against the tree. Sharik and Kuznetsov climbed a tree. And the wolves click their teeth from all sides.

Only that Sharik saved that he had a photo gun with a flash. How it flashed in the twilight at the wolves, how it shone! The wolves immediately got scared and retreated.

Kuznetsov grabbed the pig by the collar, and he and Sharik ran to the forester's lodge through the snowdrifts.

Who's there?

It's me, the postman Pechkin. He brought the magazine "Murzilka," he replies.

The hawk asks again:

Who's there?

The postman says again:

But no one opens the door. The postman knocked again and again heard:

Who's there? Who is it there?

Yes, no one. It's me, the postman Pechkin. Brought the Murzilka magazine.

And so they went on all day.

Who's there?

It's me, the postman Pechkin. Brought the Murzilka magazine.

Who's there?

It's me, the postman Pechkin. Brought the Murzilka magazine.

In the end, Pechkin became ill. He was completely tortured. He sat down on the porch and began to ask himself:

Who's there?

And the jackdaw in response:

It's me, the postman Pechkin. Brought the Murzilka magazine.

Pechkin asks again:

Who's there?

And the jackdaw answers again:

It's me, the postman Pechkin. Brought the Murzilka magazine.

When Uncle Fyodor and Matroskin came home with Sharik, they were very surprised. The postman sits on the porch and says the same thing: “Who is there?” yes "Who's there?" And from the house the same thing is heard:

It's me, the postman Pechkin. He brought the magazine "Murzilka" ... It's me, the postman Pechkin. Brought the Murzilka magazine.

Barely, they brought the postman to himself and gave him tea to drink. And when he found out what was the matter, he did not take offense. He just waved his hand and put two extra sweets in his pocket.

Chapter Seven
TR-TR MITIA

A postcard was enclosed in the magazine that Pechkin had brought. And the postcard says:

“We ask you to be at home tomorrow. A tractor has been received in your name. Head of the railway station Nesidorov.

It was printed on the bottom beautiful letters:

IN OUR COUNTRY

RAILWAYS VERY MUCH!

This made everyone happy. Especially Sharik. And they began to wait for the tractor.

Finally they brought him in a big car and put him near the house. The driver asked Uncle Fyodor to sign and gave him an envelope. The envelope contained a letter and a special booklet on how to handle the tractor. The letter read:

“Dear Uncle Fedor (boy)!

You asked me to send you a tractor not quite real and not quite a toy, and so that it was fun. We send you one. The funniest in the factory. This is an experimental model. He doesn't need gas. He works on products.

Please send feedback about the tractor to our factory.

PLANT OF RAILWAY PRODUCTS.

TR-TR MITIA PRODUCTS. 20 HP

He read and says:

Can not understand anything. What is "tr-tr"? What is "ly sy"?

What is incomprehensible here? - says the cat. - Just everything, like a watermelon. "Tr-tr" is short for "tractor". And "Mitya" means "Model Engineer Tyapkin". who wrote you a letter.

And what does twenty “ly sy” mean? - Uncle Fyodor asks.

- “Ly sy” is horsepower. This means that he will pull twenty horses if they pull in one direction, and he in the other.

So how much hay does he need? gasped Sharik.

He doesn't need hay. It says right there: he works on products.

Uncle Fyodor was even surprised:

And how do you, Matroskin, know everything? And about surnames, and about tractors, and about “lys”?

And you will live with mine, - the cat answers, - and you will find out otherwise. And where I just did not live! And some owners, and others, and in the library, and even in the savings bank. Maybe I've seen so much in my life that it's enough for a whole cat encyclopedia. But in general, you are messing around here, but my cow is not milked, my Murka.

He left. And the boy with Sharik began to start tr-tr. They began to pour soup into the tractor and stuff cutlets. Straight into the tank. How the tractor will rumble!

They got into it and drove through the village. Mitya rode and rode through the village, then he would stop at one house!

What is he? - Uncle Fyodor asks. - Maybe the fuel is over?

Nothing ended. He just smelled the smell of pies.

What other pies?

Ordinary. They bake pies in that house.

And what are we to do now?

I don't know, Sharik says. - Only it smells so delicious that I don’t want to go either.

Wow, I bought a tractor! - says Uncle Fyodor. - So we will stop near all the houses? And at the canteens. This is not a tractor, but some kind of hippopotamus. Tr-tr - eight holes! So that it was empty for him, engineer Tyapkin!

So they had to go into the house, ask for pies. Matroskin, when he found out about this, got angry with Uncle Fyodor:

I told you not to buy anything, but you still don't listen! Yes, we can’t feed this tr-tr now!

But then the cat calmed down:

Well, nothing, Uncle Fyodor, do not lose heart. It's good that you have me. We can handle your tractor. We will hold a sausage in front of him on a fishing rod. He will go for sausage and we will be lucky.

And so they did. And soon the tractor began to improve. In general, he was funny. The cabin is plastic, blue, and the wheels are iron. And it was necessary to lubricate it not with machine oil, but with sunflower oil.

But then the cow Murka added worries to them.

Chapter Eight
HOP FLOWERS

Cow Murka, which the cat bought, was stupid and spoiled. But she gave a lot of milk. So many that every day more and more. All buckets of milk were standing. All banks. There was even milk in the aquarium. The fish were swimming in it.

One day Uncle Fyodor woke up, looked, and in the washbasin there was not water, but curdled milk. Uncle Fyodor called the cat and said:

What are you doing? How to wash now?

The cat gloomily replies:

You can also wash in the river.

Yes? How about in winter? Also in the river?

And in winter you can not wash at all. There is snow all around, you won't get dirty. And in general, some language wash.

Some even eat mice, - says Uncle Fyodor. - So that there is no curdled milk in the washbasin!

The cat thought and said:

OK. I'll take the calf. Let him eat yogurt.

And in the afternoon again the news. And also with Murka. For some reason, she comes from the pasture on her hind legs. And in the mouth a flower. She goes to herself, akimbo and sings:

I remember when I was young
Our army went on a campaign somewhere ...

Only she does not know how to speak words, and she succeeds:

Mu-mu-mu-mu-mu-mu-mu-mu-mu-mu,
Mu-mu-mu-mu-mu-mu-mu-mu-mu...

And a cloud over her head like a hat. Sharik asks:

Why was she so happy? Maybe she has a holiday or something?

Chapter 6
Galchonok Khvatayka

So Uncle Fyodor began to live in the village. And the people in the village loved him. Because he did not mess around, all the time he was doing business or playing. And then his worries increased. People found out that he loves animals, and they began to bring him various animals. Whether the chick is beaten off from the flock, whether the hare is lost, they immediately take him - and to Uncle Fedor. And he messes with them, heals them and sets them free.

Once they had a jackdaw. The eyes are like buttons, the nose is thick. Angry-angry.

Uncle Fyodor fed him and put him on the closet. And they called the little jackdaw Khvatayka: whatever he sees, he drags everything to the closet. He sees matches - on the cabinet. He sees a spoon - on the cabinet. I even moved the alarm clock to the closet. And you can't take anything from him. Immediately Grab wings to the sides, hisses and pecks. He has a whole warehouse on his closet. Then he grew up a little, got better and began to fly out the window. But in the evening he was sure to return. And not empty-handed. Either the key to the closet will drag away, then the lighter, then the children's mold. Once he even brought a pacifier. Probably, some baby was sleeping in a stroller on the street, and Khvatayka flew up and pulled out the pacifier.

Uncle Fyodor was very afraid for the jackdaw: bad people could shoot him with a gun or hit him with a stick.

And the cat decided to teach the jackdaw to work:

“Why are we feeding him in vain!” May it bring benefits.

And he began to teach the galchonka to talk. For days on end I would sit beside him and say:

- Who's there? Who's there? Who's there?

Sharik asks:

- What, you have nothing to do? You'd better learn a song or a poem.

The cat replies:

- I can sing songs myself. Only they are of no use.

- And what is the use of your "ktotam"?

- And such. We will go to the forest for firewood, and no one will be left at home. Anyone can enter the house and take something away. And so a person will come, start knocking on the door, the little jackdaw will ask: “Who is there?” The person will think that someone is at home, and will not steal anything. Is that clear?

“But you yourself said that there is nothing to steal from us,” Sharik argues. You didn't even want to take me.

“It used to be nothing,” explains the cat, “and now we have found the treasure.

Sharik agreed with the cat and also began to teach the jackdaw “ktotama”. They taught him for a whole week, and finally the little jackdaw learned. As soon as someone knocks on the door or stomps on the porch, Khvatayka immediately asks:

- Who's there? Who's there? Who is it there?

And here's what came out of it. Once Uncle Fyodor, the cat and Sharik went to the forest to pick mushrooms. And there was no one at home, except for the jackdaw. Here the postman Pechkin comes. He knocked on the door and heard:

- Who's there?

- It's me, the postman Pechkin. He brought the magazine "Murzilka," he replies.

The hawk asks again:

- Who's there?

The postman says again:

But no one opens the door. The postman knocked again and again heard:

- Who's there? Who is it there?

- Yes, no one. It's me, the postman Pechkin. He brought the Murzilka magazine.

And so they went on all day.

- Who's there?

- It's me, the postman Pechkin. He brought the Murzilka magazine.

- Who's there?

- It's me, the postman Pechkin. He brought the Murzilka magazine.

In the end, Pechkin became ill. He was completely tortured. He sat down on the porch and began to ask himself:

- Who's there?

And the jackdaw in response:

- It's me, the postman Pechkin. He brought the Murzilka magazine.

Pechkin asks again:

- Who's there?

And the jackdaw answers again:

- It's me, the postman Pechkin. He brought the Murzilka magazine.

When Uncle Fyodor and Matroskin came home with Sharik, they were very surprised. The postman sits on the porch and says the same thing: “Who is there?” yes "Who's there?".

And from the house the same thing is heard:

- It's me, the postman Pechkin. He brought the magazine "Murzilka" ... It's me, the postman Pechkin. He brought the Murzilka magazine.

Barely, they brought the postman to himself and gave him tea to drink. And when he found out what was the matter, he did not take offense. He just waved his hand and put two extra sweets in his pocket.

Chapter 7
Tr-tr Mitya

A postcard was enclosed in the magazine that Pechkin brought. And the postcard says:

Please be at home tomorrow. A tractor has been received in your name.

railway station

Nesidorov.

At the bottom, it was also printed in beautiful letters:

IN OUR COUNTRY

RAILWAYS VERY MUCH!

This made everyone happy. Especially Sharik. And they began to wait for the tractor.

Finally they brought him in a big car and put him near the house. The driver asked Uncle Fyodor to sign and gave him an envelope. The envelope contained a letter and a special booklet on how to handle the tractor. The letter read:

Dear uncle Fedor (boy)!

You asked me to send you a tractor not quite real and not quite a toy, and so that it was fun. We send you one. The funniest in the factory. This is an experimental model. He doesn't need gas. He works on products.

Please send feedback about the tractor to our factory.

With best regards -

engineer Tyapkin

(inventor of the tractor).

FACTORY

TRACTOR PRODUCTS

TR-TR MITIA PRODUCTS. 20 l. With.

He read and says:

- Can not understand anything. What is "tr-tr"? What is "ly sy"?

- What's wrong with that? - says the cat. “It's just like a watermelon. “Tr-tr” is short for “tractor”. And "Mitya" means "Model of Engineer Tyapkin". who wrote you a letter.

- And what does twenty "ly sy" mean? Uncle Fyodor asks.

- “Ly sy” is horsepower. This means that he will pull twenty horses if they pull in one direction, and he in the other.

“So how much hay does he need?” Sharik gasped.

He doesn't need hay. It says right there: he works on products.

Uncle Fyodor was even surprised:

- And how do you, Matroskin, know everything? And about surnames, and about tractors, and about “lys”?

- And you live with mine, - the cat answers, - and you will find out otherwise. And where I just did not live! And some owners, and others, and in the library, and even in the savings bank. Maybe I've seen so much in my life that it's enough for a whole cat encyclopedia. But in general, you are messing around here, but my cow is not milked, my Murka.

He left. And the boy with Sharik began to start tr-tr. They began to pour soup into the tractor and stuff cutlets. Straight into the tank. How the tractor will rumble!

They got into it and drove through the village. Mitya rode and rode through the village, then he would stop at one house!

- What is he? Uncle Fyodor asks. “Maybe you ran out of fuel?”

- Nothing is over. He just smelled the smell of pies.

- What other pies?

- Ordinary. They bake pies in that house.

- And what do we do now?

“I don’t know,” Sharik says. “It just smells so delicious that I don’t want to go either.”

- Wow, I bought a tractor! - says Uncle Fedor. - So we will stop near all the houses? And at the canteens. This is not a tractor, but some kind of hippopotamus. Tr-tr - eight holes! So that it was empty for him, engineer Tyapkin!

So they had to go into the house, ask for pies. Matroskin, when he found out about this, got angry with Uncle Fyodor:

“I told you not to buy anything, but you still don’t listen!” Yes, we can’t feed this tr-tr now!

But then the cat calmed down:

- Well, nothing, Uncle Fyodor, do not lose heart. It's good that you have me. We can handle your tractor. We will hold a sausage in front of him on a fishing rod. He will go for sausage and we will be lucky.

And so they did.

And soon the tractor began to improve. In general, he was cheerful. The cabin is plastic, blue, and the wheels are iron. And it was necessary to lubricate it not with machine oil, but with sunflower oil.

But then the cow Murka added worries to them.

Chapter 8
Hops bloom

Cow Murka, which the cat bought, was stupid and spoiled. But she gave a lot of milk. So many that every day more and more. All buckets of milk were standing. All banks. There was even milk in the aquarium. The fish were swimming in it.

One day Uncle Fyodor woke up, looked, and there was not water in the washbasin, but curdled milk. Uncle Fyodor called the cat and said:

– What are you doing? How to wash now?

The cat gloomily replies:

- You can wash in the river.

- Yes? How about in winter? Also in the river?

- And in winter you can not wash at all. There is snow all around, you won't get dirty. And in general, some people wash their tongues.

“Some even eat mice,” Uncle Fyodor says. - And so that there is no curdled milk in the washbasin!

The cat thought and said:

- OK. I'll take the calf. Let him eat yogurt.

And in the afternoon again the news. And also with Murka. For some reason, she comes from the pasture on her hind legs. And in the mouth a flower. She goes to herself, akimbo and sings:

I remember when I was young
Our army went on a campaign somewhere ...

Only she can’t speak words, and she succeeds:

Mu-mu-mu-mu-mu-mu-mu-mu-mu-mu,
Mu-mu-mu-mu-mu-mu-mu-mu-mu...

And a cloud over her head, like a hat. Sharik asks:

- Why is she so happy? Maybe she has a holiday or something?

- What holiday? - says Uncle Fedor.

Maybe it's her birthday. Or kefir day. Or maybe a cow New Year.

- What's New Year's about? Matroskin says. - She just overate henbane or hops.

And how the cow scatters - and bang her head into the wall! Barely managed to drive her into the barn. Matroskin went to milk her. Five minutes later he comes out, and something strange has happened to him. He has a sailor suit in front like an apron, and a pail on his head like a helmet. And he sings something absurd:

I am a sailor
I walk in the open
Day after day,
From wave to wave!

Obviously, he tried milk cheerful. Sharik says to Uncle Fyodor:

- First, our cow went crazy, and now the cat has gone crazy. We should call an ambulance.

“Let’s wait some more,” Uncle Fyodor says. “Perhaps they will come to their senses.

What is there in yourself! Murka in the barn, Oginsky's polonaise began to mumble:

Mu-mu-mu-mu-mu-mu-mu-mu!
Mu-mu-mu-mu-mu!

And the cat did something strange in general:

Lived with grandma
Two cheerful geese:
one grey,
Other white -
Petya and Marusya! -

and also head to the wall - bang!

At this point, Uncle Fyodor became agitated:

- On you, Sharik, two kopecks. Run call an ambulance on the machine.

Sharik ran away, and the cat and the cow began to come to their senses. They stopped singing and mooing. The cat grabbed his head and said:

- Wow, our cow gives milk! From it, only make condensed milk and throw it to the enemies in the war. So that they go crazy and climb out of the trenches.

And then the postman Pechkin comes to them. Ruddy and happy.

Look what I read in the newspaper. About one boy. His eyes are brown and his hair sticks up in front, as if a cow had licked him. And height one meter twenty.

- So what? - says the cat. - How many of these boys!

- Maybe a lot, - the postman answers, - only this boy left the house. And his parents are worried about him. And they even promised a prize to whoever finds it. Maybe they'll give you a bike. And I need a bicycle, to deliver mail. I even brought a meter: I will measure your master.

As soon as Sharik heard, he grabbed his heart. Here Pechkin will measure Uncle Fyodor, then he will take him home - what will they do with the cat? They'll be lost!

But the cat was not taken aback and said:

– It is always possible to measure. And you drink milk first. I just milked a cow. My Murka.

Postman agrees:

- I will drink milk with pleasure. Milk is very beneficial. They even write about it in the newspapers. Give me the biggest mug.

The cat ran into the house and rather brought him the largest mug. He poured milk into it and gives it to Pechkin. Pechkin how he drinks, how he goggles his eyes! How to sing:

When I worked as a coachman at the post office,
I was young, I had strength! -

and also head to the wall - knock!

And the jackdaw from the house asks:

- Who's there? Who is it there?

The postman replies:

- It's me, the postman Pechkin! Brought a meter for you. I will measure your milk. Give me the biggest mug!

And here " ambulance” has arrived. Two orderlies come out and ask:

"Who's the crazy one here?"

Pechkin says:

This house has gone crazy! Leaps at me.

The orderlies took him by the arms and led him to the car. And they say:

- Now the hops are blooming. A lot of people go crazy. Especially cows.

When they left, Uncle Fyodor said to the cat:

- Pour this milk somewhere. So that there is no trouble again.

And the cat is sorry to pour out. He decided to give milk to the tractor. Mitya. Nothing will happen to the car. Tractors don't go crazy. And poured all the milk into the tank. Straight from the bucket.

Mitya stood, stood, then how he rumbles - and at the cat! The cat threw a bucket and rather on a tree! And Mitya began to play football with a bucket. Played, played, until he turned into a cake. Ah yes, the model of engineer Tyapkin!

And then he went through the village to hooligan. Hill up weeds and chase chickens. And all sorts of songs buzz. In the end, he even went for a swim. Slightly faint. He got out somehow on the shore, he felt ashamed. He drove up to the house, stood up in his place, did not look at anyone. He scolds himself.

Uncle Fyodor was very angry with Matroskin and put him in a corner:

“Next time, do as you are told.

Sharik kept laughing at the cat.

But Uncle Fyodor Sharik said:

- OK OK. There is nothing to laugh at a person when he is standing in a corner.

Of course, Matroskin was a cat, not a man. But for Uncle Fyodor, he was still like a person.

And with this cow there were still adventures. And not a few.

Chapter 9
Your son is Uncle Farik

The next day Uncle Fyodor decided to write a letter home. So that mom and dad don't worry about him. Because he loved them very much. They didn't know where he was or what happened to him. And, of course, they were worried.

Uncle Fyodor sits and writes:

My mom and dad!

I live well. Just great. I have my own house. He is warm. It has one room and a kitchen. And recently we found a treasure and bought a cow. And the tractor - tr-tr Mitya. The tractor is good, but he does not like gasoline, but loves soup.

Mom and dad, I miss you very much. Especially in the evenings. But I won't tell you where I live. Otherwise, you will take me away, and Matroskin and Sharik will disappear.

But then Uncle Fyodor saw that the village guys were launching a kite in the field. And Uncle Fyodor ran to them. And he ordered the cat to finish the letter for him. The cat took a pencil and began to write:

We also have a hot stove. I love hanging out on it so much! My health is not very good: sometimes it hurts my paws, sometimes my tail falls off. Because, my dear dad and mom, my life was difficult, full of hardships and expulsions. But now it's different. And I have sausage, and fresh milk is in a bowl on the floor. Drink - I don't want to. I don't even want to see mice. I just catch them for fun. Either on a bait, or with a vacuum cleaner, I pull it out of the minks and take it into the field. And during the day I like to climb on the roof. And there I'll goggle my eyes, straighten my mustache and sunbathe like crazy. I lick my lips in the sun and dry.

Then the cat heard that the mice in the underground were scratching. He shouted to Sharik and ran into the underground with a vacuum cleaner. He took the pencil ball in his teeth and began to scribble further:

And the other day I started shedding. Old wool is falling off me - even if you don’t go into the house. But the new one is growing - clean, silky! Just doodle. And yes, I'm a little hoarse. There are a lot of passers-by, you have to bark at everyone. You bark for an hour, you bark for two, and then I don’t bark, but some kind of whistle turns out and gurgling.

Dear dad and mom, you just don’t recognize me now. My tail is hooked, my ears are upright, my nose is cold and shaggy has increased. Now I can even sleep in the snow in winter. Now I go to the store myself. And all the sellers know me. They give me bones for free... So don't worry about me. I became so healthy, right - wow! If I get to the exhibition, all the medals are provided to me. For beauty and ingenuity.

Goodbye.

Your son is Uncle Sharik.

Then he wanted to change the word "Sharik" to "Fedor". And it turned out something completely incomprehensible:

Goodbye.

Your son is Uncle Farik.

He and Matroskin sealed the letter, wrote down the address, and Sharik carried it in his teeth to the mailbox.

But the letter from the box did not soon go to the address. Because the postman Pechkin was in the isolation ward. At first he did not want to stay there. He said that it was not he who went crazy, but the house of Uncle Fyodor, who began to butt heads.

And then he liked being in isolation. There was no need to deliver letters, and the food was good. He also met an accountant there. The children brought this accountant to the hospital. And he brought up Pechkin all the time. He said:

- Pechkin, don't jump on the bed!

- Pechkin, don't lean out the window!

- Pechkin, do not throw cutlets at your comrades!

Although Pechkin did not stick out from anywhere, did not jump anywhere and did not throw any cutlets at his comrades.

But Pechkin was offended by Uncle Fyodor. He spoke like this:

- Some people keep dogs and cats at home, but I don’t even have a bicycle.

But that was later. In the meantime, he was in the isolation ward and the letter was in the mailbox.

Chapter 10
The ball goes to the forest

Uncle Fyodor and the cat lived in the house.

And Sharik kept running around the site or sitting in the booth. And spent the night there. He came to the house only to dine or so, to visit. And then one day he sits in his booth and thinks: “The cat bought himself a cow. Uncle Fedor is a tractor. And I'm the worst, right? It's time for me to buy a gun for happiness. As long as there is money."

Uncle Fyodor tried to dissuade him from buying a gun - it's a pity for the little animals. And the cat tried to dissuade - he spared the money. And the dog doesn't want to listen.

“Step aside,” he says, “to the side!” My instinct is awakening! Animals are designed to be hunted. I did not understand this before, because I lived badly! And now I have recovered, and I was pulled into the forest with terrible force!

He went to the store and bought a gun. And I bought cartridges, and I bought a hunting bag to put all kinds of animals there.

“Wait for me,” he says, “by the evening. I'll get you something tasty.

He left the village and went into the forest. He sees a collective farmer riding a cart. Farmer says:

- Sit down, hunter, I'll give you a lift.

Sharik sat on the cart, paws dangling. And the farmer asks:

- And how do you shoot, friend? Fine?

- But how! Sharik says.

“And if I drop my hat, will you hit it?”

The ball stood up on its hind legs, prepared a gun.

“Throw away,” he says, “your hat.” Now there will be nothing left of her. One holes.

The driver took off his hat and threw it into the air.

High, high, under the clouds.

Ball ka-ak woman-a-hnet!

The horse is getting scared!

And - run!

The cart, of course, is behind her.

The ball on its feet could not resist surprise and flew upside down from the cart. As on the road - plop! Wow the hunt begins!

He came to the forest, he sees: a hare is sitting in a clearing. The dog loaded the gun, prepared the bag and began to creep up.

- Now I'm going to hit him!

The hare saw him - and run. The ball is behind him. But he tripped over something and got tangled in the bag. In which it is necessary to carry booty. He sits in a bag and thinks: “Wow, the hunt begins! What is it, now I will carry myself home?! It turns out that I'm also a hunter, I'm also a trophy? There will be some laughter ... "

Get out of the bag - and on the trail. Shotgun behind, nose to the ground. He ran to a narrow river, he sees: a hare is already jumping on the other side. The dog shot a gun in his teeth and swam - do not throw a hare! And the heavy gun is about to drown Sharik. Sharik looks, and he is already at the bottom.

“What does it come out? the dog thinks. “This is not hunting, this is already fishing!”

He decided to throw the gun and emerge as soon as possible.

“Well, nothing, unfortunate hare, I’ll show you more! I'll get you without a gun! I'll poke your ears! You will learn how to mock hunters!”

He pops up, pops up, but he doesn't pop up at all. He was entangled in a belt from a gun and in a bag.

Everything, the end of Sharik!

But then he felt that someone pulled him up by the collar, towards the sun. And it was an old beaver, he was building a dam nearby.

He pulled Sharik out and said:

- I have nothing to do, only to pull different dogs out of the water!

Sharik answers:

“And I didn’t ask to be pulled out!” I may not have drowned at all. Maybe I went scuba diving! I have not yet decided what I was doing there, at the bottom.

And it’s so bad for yourself - even shout the guard. And the water from it splashes like a fountain, and it is ashamed to raise your eyes on the beaver. Still would! He went to hunt animals, but instead they saved him from death.

He walks home along the coast. Downcast like a wet chicken. He drags a gun on a strap and thinks to himself: “Something doesn’t work out so well with my hunting. First I fell off the cart. Then he got confused in his hunting bag. And in the end, he nearly drowned. I don't like this hunt. I'd rather fish. I'll buy myself fishing rods, net. I'll take a sandwich with sausage and I'll sit on the shore. I will be a fishing dog, not a hunting dog. I don't want to shoot animals. I will only save them."

It's easy to say, but hard to do. After all, he was born a hunting dog, and not some other.

Chapter 11
beaver

And Uncle Fyodor and Matroskin are sitting at home. They are waiting for the ball from the hunt. Uncle Fyodor makes a bird feeder, and the cat takes care of the housework: he sews on buttons and darns socks.

It was already dark outside the window when Sharik arrived. He picked up his bag and shook the animal onto the table. The beast is small, fluffy, with sad eyes and a shovel tail.

Here's who I brought.

– Where did you get it? Uncle Fyodor asks.

- He pulled it out of the river. He was sitting on the shore, saw me and jumped into the river! With a fright. I barely caught him. And then he would drown. After all, he's still small.

The cat listened, listened and says:

- Oh, you bastard! After all, it's a beaver! He lives in the water. This is his home. You can say you pulled him out of the house!

The dog answers:

- Who knew him that he lives in the water? I thought he wanted to drown! Look how wet I am!

And I don't want to look! - says the cat. “I’m also a hunter, he doesn’t know anything about animals!” - And climbed into the oven.

And the beaver sits, its eyes goggle at everyone. Doesn't understand anything. Uncle Fyodor gave him boiled milk. The little beaver drank milk, and his eyes began to close.

- Where can I put him to sleep? the boy asks.

- As where? - says the dog. - If he lives in the water, he must be put in a basin.

- You yourself should be put in the basin! shouts Matroskin from the stove. - To make you smarter a little!

The dog was quite upset:

You said yourself that he lives in the water.

“He only swims in the water, but he lives in a house on the shore,” the cat explains.

Then Uncle Fyodor took the beaver and put it in the closet, in the shoebox. And the beaver immediately fell asleep. And Sharik also went to sleep in his booth. He's not used to lying in bed. He was a country dog, not spoiled.

In the morning Uncle Fyodor woke up and heard something strange in the house. As if someone is sawing firewood: dr-dr... dr-dr...

And again: dr-dr... dr-dr...

He got up from the bed and sees the horror that. They do not have a house, but a carpentry workshop. There are shavings, chips and sawdust all around. And there was no dining table. In a pile of shavings, a beaver sits and grinds a dining room leg.

The cat dangled its paws from the stove and says:

- Look what your Sharik suits us. Now I have to buy a new table. It's good that I cleared all the dishes from the table. We would be left without plates! With one fork.

They called Sharik.

"Look what you're doing to us!"

“And if he sawed through my bed,” Uncle Fyodor says, “I would have crashed right on the floor in the middle of the night.” Thank you!

He gave Sharik a hunting bag and said:

- Run to the river, right without breakfast, and take the beaver to the place where you got it. Yes, look more from the river do not catch anyone! We are not millionaires!

Sharik put the beaver into the bag and ran without talking. He himself was not happy that he had caught the beaver. And the beaver's parents were very happy and did not scold Sharik. They realized that it was not out of malice that he dragged their son away - due to a misunderstanding. So everything ended very well. I just had to buy a new table.

But since then, Sharik has become homesick. He wants to hunt in the forest - and that's it! And when he comes out with a gun, he sees an animal - he can’t shoot, even though you cry! He will come from the forest - he does not eat, does not drink: longing gnaws at him. He became dead, tortured - worse than ever!